tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31238102763204825922024-03-20T12:09:08.291+02:00The Bottom Line"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~ Dr. Seuss Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.comBlogger61125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-29567967901471977962015-02-22T16:38:00.000+02:002015-02-22T16:38:20.726+02:00Looking around after the event....There comes a stage after the long hard fight when you can look back and evaluate everything that happened, everything that you felt, and how that affects the rest of your life.<br />
I fought cancer for a year and a half with all my strength, and I am still fighting to overcome the residual effects. Now, though, I feel strong enough to see things - and people around me- clearly. I have read many conflicting accounts by cancer survivors; some say that they felt an incredible amount of support from everyone around them, others were more down to earth and said that people treated them no differently. For me, I feel that cancer was a watershed.<br />
Before cancer I had no way of knowing who my friends really were. When I was lying in bed feeling too weak to get up in the middle of chemo, when cold water hurt to drink, when I was lying in intensive care after barely scraping through an emergency operation for peritonitis, it suddenly became apparent, very apparent. Luckily for me I was and am surrounded by people who care for me, first of all my wonderful partner, Oren, who took a lot of s**t when I was on the steroid crash once every three weeks during chemo, when I was hurting after each of the three operations I had, and when I just felt crappy, and kept on through it all, doggedly determined to see it out. My daughters all kept in touch and visited as often as they could, and my parents emailed regularly and visited from abroad twice during this time. Waking up to see all my daughters and Oren peeping round the door to the recovery room after the last operation was the best present I could possibly have got, even though they were hustled out by the nurse immediately. I knew they were there, I knew they cared enough to be there, and that gave me so much strength. Oren's family too, tried their best to help, although I think they were a bit scared of me. I was thorny, I know; I am thorny at the best of times, and these were not the best of times.<br />
One of the best things which happened in this time was that I got back in touch with my best friend from way back, and she gave me another valuable source of strength and comfort,another shoulder to cry on and a good laugh too sometimes.<br />
With all the good has to be bad; how would we recognize good otherwise? Those who tried to push religion, quack remedies, internet rumours of a miracle cure...And those who just didn't care enough to stay in touch. Those who never sent an unsolicited email, or sent one, and then forgot about me. Those who didn't visit, or offer to visit, those who never picked up a phone, once, to ask how I was. Those people are no longer on my Christmas list, and silly as it may sound, it took something like this for me to take them off it.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-30278185469697258522015-02-19T21:20:00.002+02:002015-02-19T21:20:42.085+02:00Two Updates in One Year!Yep, me again. Just thought I'd check in and say that all's well. My surgeon was happy with everything, after prodding my smiley face stomach ( which he is responsible for, anyway...) and shoving his finger where the light don't shine, AGAIN! I hate that. But I do like to be told that everything is ok.<br />
So we will be off on our next adventure soon, my grandchild is doing well and will probably be talking by the time we get back, laden with cuddly toys, I expect!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-3183900670215995542015-01-25T12:13:00.001+02:002015-01-25T12:13:09.158+02:00Sorry!!!For all, or should I say any, of my faithful followers who have been checking back to try to find out what is going on; I am really sorry for not updating for so long. I always hate it when I am crazy to know what is happening with other people and they don't update, and hey, here I am doing the same thing.<br />
So; I didn't do any CEA tests after the one in Palawan. Scared to, really, and I just wanted to forget about cancer and do something else, which is also why I didn't write anything. It's been almost nine months of ignoring cancer, and it was great, except for the nagging feeling at three in the morning that I really should be checking...<br />
We arrived back in 'reality' a few weeks ago, and the first thing I did was to make an appointment with the doctor. Reality means Israel, modern medicine, lots of people who ask you what is going on, so basically no choice but to go and get tested. My CEA came back as 1.78, which, while not as low as I would really like ( I'd like 0) is reasonable. It is lower than the result nine months ago, but higher than those in the same lab a year ago. Let's say I can live with it. ( Black humour...) Then I went for a CT of chest, stomach and pelvis, so all of me more or less, and that was clear, which, frankly, amazed me. Now I am waiting for my check up with the surgeon who did my operations, which is on Wednesday.<br />
The real reason we came to Israel is to be here for the birth of my first grandchild. It seems so strange to be a granny, but that is what I now am! The baby is lovely, and my daughter is fine, although the birth was extremely long and she had pre-eclampsia. It is so good to see everyone here, and my parents will be here soon too, so I'm hoping to get a few good 'four generation' photos.<br />
We have big plans for the next year or so; I feel as though I have been given a chance to have one last big adventure, so we will be going back to Chasamba on the 27th of February, and after stocking up as much as possible we will set sail for Papua New Guinea and the Solomon Islands, stopping at several tiny atolls on the way; Helen Reef and Ninigo atoll, two of the most beautiful places on earth. See those and die! ( Too much black humour?) After that we will decide whether to carry on south down to Australia or go north east up to Micronesia. So, there will be a few months that this blog won't be updated, but hey, you're used to that, I guess. (Sorry again...)<br />
Actually I am having a hard time getting used to the idea that I'm not going to die just yet. I was pretty sure I was riddled with cancer and just about to start feeling it; having a clean scan really threw me. I suppose that's just my way of dealing with all this. If you resign yourself to the fact that you are going to die, you can concentrate on living meanwhile. We have done so much these ast few months- Chasamba was in a terrible shape when we got back to her, and after overhauling the engine we sailed to Carmen on Cebu island and got her hauled out of the water. Non too soon, she had lots of rust and several places where the whole thickness of her bottom was rust, so that any little bang would have sunk us. Chasamba has cancer too! But we cut it out, welded her back together and scrubbed her, painted her and did lots of work which hopefully will keep her afloat for a few more years.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-79052704124534054322014-05-07T07:31:00.000+03:002014-05-07T07:31:01.816+03:00CEA ResultsI'm getting slowly but surely back to a semblance of normal, as far as digestion is concerned, anyway. I now know for certain, after a lot of trial and error (mostly error, ouch!) that at the moment I cannot eat any vegetables at all, no garlic, no ginger and no chili, pepper or paprika. As long as I avoid those, life is reasonably good, and if I don't forget to take one imodium in the morning and another before lunch, and also take Metamucil with every meal, things are even better. I can go out for hours and not worry too much, and on Sunday we went for the buffet lunch at the Yacht Club here in Puerto Princesa and stayed for four hours after a large meal talking to other cruisers- I was fine! I can eat some fruit, like papaya, which is really good here, and bananas, so I can get enough vitamins not to get rickets!<br />
On Monday I went to do my three monthly CEA test. I don't know how to react to the result, really. It was 2.14, which is an increase from the last test. Since finishing chemo I have had three tests, the first was 0.88, the second 1.36 and now 2.14. It looks as though the CEA is slowly creeping up, and if that is true it is bad news. But there are a few things which mean that I can't be sure of that; firstly, this is a different laboratory, maybe using a different test kit- there are several, and each give slightly different results, enough to produce results like mine. Secondly, anything which causes inflammation can cause CEA to rise, and it is certainly true that I have had an inflamed bum for a while.<br />
This level of CEA is still not enough to be sure about, basically, so all I can do is either to wait three months and test again or wait a month and test again. I'm in two minds about what to do, and I guess I'll make my mind up on the spur of the moment. In three months I have to do a liver ultrasound too, although I could move it up. I don't know, I'm just confused what to think. I know if I talk to my oncologist he won't be concerned about this result. I just have to try to forget about it and get on with life, I guess. This is so typical of this disease, there is so much uncertainty all the time. Maybe that is the hardest thing. Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-59788082744099770832014-04-24T13:03:00.000+03:002014-04-24T13:03:21.791+03:00Ten Weeks (and a bit...)This is the first time I can use the word 'good' to describe how I feel since the reversal operation. The last few weeks have been better and better, partly because I have started to use more Imodium. With the long trip to Chasamba, I took plenty of Imodium and had a good experience. I really didn't have any problems at all, even though it was 36 hours of travel, three planes and lots of airport time. As a result I have carried on taking it since then, playing around a bit with timing and amount to see what works. So, I've got to the point where 2 tablets first thing in the morning and another one some time in the afternoon seem to have the desired effect, which means that I feel safe to go out, usually have only two or three lavatory visits per day and no out of control rushes at all. I am still taking Metamucil, although I keep forgetting and I'm not really convinced that it makes that much difference. One thing which has helped a lot is that I have started having porridge for breakfast; my stomach really seems to like it and the silence afterwards is remarkable, no bubbling, volcanic eruptions or even squeaks! And, I had SALAD today! Only three spoons, just in case, but everything is ok so far. I was amazed at the crunch of fresh vegetables, I had completely forgotten how salad feels. Papaya is another food which is fine, I had half a medium sized one yesterday, and bananas of course too are ok, so I'm getting enough vitamins. I won't take vitamin supplements since there is some data which suggests that antioxidants help cancer cells survive. I'm still drinking lots of green tea too.<br />
I can share with you now the fact that until a short time ago I really thought I had made a mistake having the reversal. I had perfect control with the ileostomy, and then suddenly, I'm shitting all over the place, stuck on the loo all the time, having a sore sore bum and afraid that that's how my life is going to be from now on... It doesn't help that doctors are vague about what to expect, and reading other people's experiences can be very scary too. Some people still have no quality of life years after reversal. I didn't want to post my fears because I did hope that I was wrong and that things would get better, and thank goodness, they have.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-68564264023573599832014-03-30T18:49:00.000+03:002014-03-30T18:49:34.843+03:00Seven Weeks On...Just coming to write this update has done me good. Until I read what I wrote nearly a month ago I had forgotten how far I have come, and how much things have changed. I have had a lot of ups and downs in the last few weeks, the worst stage being a few days of really bad rectal pain, so bad that I was taking pain killers and Valium just to be able to sleep, and really felt rough. I suspect that may have been a flare up of radiation proctitis caused partly by having home made tomato soup- too acidic for my poor old bum, at least just yet.<br />
My bowel is gradually starting to settle down, and I have also discovered a really good trick which seems definitely to help. I've only started this today, but it really has made a difference to me, so I'll pass it on; As you get better organized, there gets to be a certain time of day when your bowels decide it is OPEN time. For me this is after lunch, but everyone is different, and for some people it is after every meal. The problem for me was that I would start going to the loo after lunch and be in and out maybe 10 times or more until everything calmed down for another day, usually after 4-5 hours. This is draining, bad for your ass and very restricting, you can't go anywhere during this time, even trying to cook or do basically anything is difficult. I was taking Imodium with little effect. SO....the big secret is this- take one Imodium half an hour to an hour before the meal which gives you grief. It doesn't mean you won't go at all, (I was worried about this, weirdly!) but it does slow things down and make it all come together. Eureka! I have only been three times to the loo today! No-one who hasn't been in this situation can understand how much this means; I was getting so depressed and angry, I didn't know what to do with myself. One little tablet and everything is better.<br />
I am back on the Metamucil by the way, I gradually built up from a teaspoon once a day up to three spoons and the gas is better. I am still not eating much fresh vegetables or fruit, except bananas, but I did have some cabbage salad and a few beans on Saturday, both considered potential trouble makers, with no bad effects. I would try to introduce more veggies, but it isn't really a good time now, because tomorrow we go on a big trip. Yes, back to dear old Chasamba, waiting for us in Puerto Princesa. It's a 36 hour journey, which means that my Imodium discovery is just in time. We leave here tomorrow afternoon and travel to Jordan by road, get on a plane to Bangkok, then Hong Kong, then Manila, then Puerto Princesa. Four flights, but thank goodness not much waiting in airports, which I hate the most, and the long flight is a night flight, so we can sleep. I hope. I have chosen seats near the loo, just in case.<br />
I am so happy to be going home at last, even though this is my home too, and Oren's relatives have been very good to us. But Chasamba needs us, her keel plates need changing and her engine needs to be fixed, she needs to sail again, and so do we!<br />
I will have regular check ups in whatever country we are in; my next one is CEA in May. So far my levels are; 0.8, 1.37. May will be the third since finishing treatment, and I'm obviously hoping for a low one, fingers crossed.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-86528132000366776242014-03-02T20:41:00.001+02:002014-03-02T20:41:10.637+02:00The three week mark...Three weeks post reversal, and things are still up and down. I had a few really good days with very few bowel movements and actual TURDS, something I haven't experienced for more than a year. But unfortunately it didn't last; I don't know what I ate or whether it had nothing to do with food, but I went back to what I can only describe as sludge. Sludge tends to be hard to control and also enjoys announcing itself just at unfortunate moments....<br />
Then I think I made a mistake- Metamucil is supposed to help reduce diarrhea and form stools, so if you have sludge it makes sense to up the dosage, sound reasonable? NO. This is a bad idea. Remember this post, anyone who is on the same course as me, you will save a lot of toilet time. When you increase the amount of soluble fiber you are taking, you may find (as I did) that you suddenly get a lot of gas. And I mean A LOT of gas. Enough gas to fill a zeppelin. I'm just assuming, I didn't actually fill a zeppelin or anything, but believe me, I was scared to light a match indoors. And this is combined with aforementioned sludge. I think you get the idea. 'Wet fart' doesn't even scratch the surface, and this is happening six to ten times AN HOUR!!!!<br />
I think on one hand the gas is a good sign; it means my intestinal flora have well and truly recovered from the beating they have had over the last year. It may not be a coincidence that I had some probiotic yogurt this morning too, maybe my bacteria are having a celebration. On the other hand, it's awful, and I'm back to the sore bum stage again. I have found out that water is the best antidote to the burning- washing really well after each mini-hiroshima helps a lot. Now my stomach seems to be calming down, and I think I'll try a day or so without Metamucil to see what happens.<br />
On the positive side, I feel generally quite a lot better, no more fevers and the scar looks pretty good. So, it's like two steps forward one step back. That's ok, it could be one step forward two back, I'm not complaining.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-47247326688447050692014-02-25T15:09:00.000+02:002014-02-25T15:09:28.320+02:00Ok, so sometimes an anthill can turn into a mountain....First things first- my CT was good, I'm NED for another three months! ( NED is No Evidence of Disease).<br />
The operation. This is going to be long and a bit painful to read, but nowhere near as painful as it was to go through it. We got to the hospital on time, went to the outpatients and I was admitted, prepped and duly operated on, a short and apparently completely successful procedure. It turned out that I hadn't understood properly, and I did have to be in hospital for surveillance, and I was trundled up to Surgery B ward to a nice room at the end of the ward, obviously considered low risk. The only unpleasant thing at this stage was that the other occupant of the room was a woman with awful flu who looked extremely contagious and was also an absolute hole in the head. She spent half of every night trying to get her grown up children to get out of bed, come to the hospital and bring her fruit juice, or wandering about crying, or ordering Thai food and scoffing it all down noisily. Meanwhile, I started to feel sick, and after a few hours vomited. This can happen after an operation, but I didn't feel right, somehow. Gradually over the next few days my stomach swelled up and on Sunday I finally got a high fever and started to get edema all over my body. It wasn't painful actually, the doctors were surprised that my stomach didn't hurt. I gradually acquired a stomach tube, a catheter and an iv pole shoving loads of fluids into my system. Then I was sent for a CT which showed free fluid in my abdomen although the contrast medium hadn't got down to the anastamosis, so it couldn't show any leak. So, at about 9.15pm on Sunday I was rushed into a second operation.<br />
What they found was a bit confusing; not classic peritonitis but mostly blood and clots, with no obvious place which was bleeding, while the intestines were suffering and bloated. So after spending a while looking for any possible cause, they decided to cut out the anastamosis and do a new one further on. Since my cecum was bloated and looked bad they cut just after it, so that I now have no appendix, a bright point! Then they did a thorough wash out of my stomach and closed up shop. I woke up the next morning with a 20cm incision and two drains, plus the original operation scar,plus aforementioned feeding tube, catheter and iv drip. I looked a bit as though I had been in a car accident!<br />
Over the next few days I got all the complications; a respiratory infection, a nasty wound infection and to top it all, terrible diarrhea. The infections posed a problem for the doctors; I'm allergic to Zinacef, which means I can't have most of the antibiotics usually used to treat these infections. Here I actually had a lucky break, because in the end, after huffing and puffing, the hospital had to authorize Imipenem, a really good strong antibiotic usually held back as last line of defense treatment. After four days of that stuff I was really good to go!<br />
So, I've been home now for nearly a week, and I am starting to feel really ok. The first few days were pretty difficult, I kept exploding every few minutes and was in the loo most of the day, no exaggeration! It was really liquid, and impossible to control. I went through plenty of pairs of pants, even though I am wearing pads, and I really couldn't do anything except poop, which is why I haven't updated the blog! Now everything seems to be slowing down a bit, and getting solider, which is lucky because my anus is really raw, even though I'm using zinc cream, pile cream and whatever else I can find.Aloe vera seems to help quite a bit. I'm following the MD Anderson program which is probably the most organised one, and I'm taking Metamucil as they advise- I asked permission from Professor Shpitz to take it. Metamucil probably helps a bit, and the low residue diet I'm on probably helps a bit more, and time probably helps the most. I can see the improvement; now it seems to be that a few minutes after eating I need to go and if I sit for a while it can be only once. If I get impatient and get off, I'm going to have to go back a few times, but after that series of poops I'll be ok for a few hours. I would like to get back to eating more healthily, but for now I don't dare. Thank goodness Marmite is allowed, at least I can get a few vitamins from that. Maybe next week I'll try a bit of lettuce or something, but for now I'm sticking with potatoes, rice, meat, fish and white bread. I did try some yoghurt this morning and the reception seemed to be ok, so that's good. I also managed a walk of about half a kilometre! And helped Oren hang the washing up!<br />
And talking of Oren I have to say that he has been spoiling me rotten. He cooks, does the laundry, brings me tea in bed and generally keeps my morale up. He says he is keeping score and that I will have a hard time paying him back- I hope I never have to pay him back in kind but I gladly would!<br />
<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-66029217649811136162014-02-04T10:08:00.001+02:002014-02-04T10:08:39.105+02:00Countdown to being stomaless....So.... I was supposed to be stomaless by now, the operation being planned for Monday. But on Thursday I got a phone call from the hospital to say that they want to change the plan- instead of being in hospital for a day before the operation and a few more after, they want to do it as an out-patient procedure, and change the day to Thursday. I was actually really glad; the worst part of the whole thing is the hospital stay, and I will feel much better at home. It isn't far to the hospital, so if I have any urgent problem I can be there quite quickly.<br />
I keep looking at my stoma in the shower and wondering what it will be like to be without it. I'm so used to it, I actually feel as though something is going to be taken away from me. How will I manage without it? This is a real concern, since I have only a small amount of rectum left. Things might get really wild for a while, I'm envisioning mad dashes to the loo, awful accidents in train stations, hours spent wondering whether I will be able to leave the rest room.... I hope it won't be as bad as that, but who knows?<br />
The CT I did nearly two weeks ago is still not ready, I wish I had asked for it urgently. I'm fed up of waiting and although I try not to think about it I find myself checking my email ten times a day to see if it is in yet.<br />
So this is a 'before' post. Next time I update I hope I will be after both these little ant hills that are looming like mountains!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-69881282106842066942014-01-16T13:36:00.002+02:002014-01-16T13:36:54.583+02:00Back to Reality....After seven wonderful weeks spent in Palawan, Philippines, we are back in Israel for the operation to close my stoma. I had a really good time on Chasamba, and I know she needed our care urgently too; Oren and I worked hard almost all the seven weeks, chipping and sanding, fibreglassing and painting, repairing sails and trying to fix the engine. It was just what the doctor ordered, a complete break from cancer treatment, tests and visits to the oncologist; I wish we didn't have to come back to reality with such a bump. After a grueling journey of 36 hours by plane, plane, 7 hours in Abu Dhabi, plane, bus, bus and finally bus, we arrived home to a lovely surprise of a bed ready to hop into, hot water for a shower and a welcome from Oren's brothers and mother. We are both still jet lagged and have colds, but gradually are finding our land legs.<br />
Today I went to get referrals for blood tests, a CT scan, chest x-ray and ecg, on Sunday I have blood tests done, on Thursday the CT, on the 26th pre op and on the 2nd of February I go to get my stoma closed. I am so used to it, it will be weird not having it. And probably inconvenient, to be honest. Oh well, here we go again!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-14838635384000300712013-12-18T14:10:00.002+02:002013-12-18T14:14:18.716+02:00Guess what; you CAN swim all day with a stoma!We've been back in the Philippines for four out of our seven and a half precious weeks, and have spent most of it getting Chasamba sea worthy and rust free (more or less....). We decided on Sunday it was finally time for a real holiday, and got on a bus to El Nido, the wonderful little holiday village which sits nearly at the northern tip of Palawan. Here limestone carsts form stunningly beautiful islands wreathed with cloud and the water is clear with good visibility. The main activity to do in El Nido is to take a banca trip out to the islands and snorkel, have lunch - grilled fish, rice, salad and papaya, comes with the banca and crew, snorkel some more and go home slightly sunburned but happy. As you can imagine, I was more than a little worried about swimming all day with a stoma; visions of awfully embarrassing potential accidents kept crowding out the expectations of fun. I wasnt about to give in though, and miss the best bit of the holiday, so I prepared an emergency pack of bases, bags and everything I might need, and threw it into the bottom of the bag with towels, snorkelling gear and suntan lotion.<br />
The trick, I discovered, is NOT TO CHECK ANYTHING! Unless the whole base actually falls off, in which case you obviously do have to do something, there is really no problem. After all morning swimming the only problem was finding some discreet place to empty the bag after lunch, (there are no toilets out there!) and in the end I did this in the sea a long way from anyone else on the beach, round a little headland, underwater. It was fine, easier than using some toilets, actually! And the fish had fun too. After all day in the water when I got back to our cottage and checked, the base had partly separated, maybe an inch or two, but there was no actual leakage at all, and I'm fairly sure no-one on the trip had any idea I have a stoma. My bathing suit has a skirt and the cut is generous enough to hide it, so, yes, I would do it again!<br />
Tomorrow it's back to the grind, we have lots more work to do before we leave on the 14th. Merry Christmas, everyone!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-47138559487049553562013-12-12T07:45:00.002+02:002013-12-12T07:45:48.512+02:00Puerto Princesa, yacht therapy.We've been here for three weeks, ( for those of you who don't follow my other blog, chasamba.com, here is Puerto Princesa, Palawan, where our yacht, Chasamba, has been sitting on a mooring waiting for us for the last fifteen months) and really all we have done is work. I know most people think that living on a yacht is like one long holiday, having cocktails on the deck and watching the sun go down after another glorious day of sunbathing and swimming.... Well, our boat isn't quite like that. After fifteen months of not being lived in and cared for, Chasamba has some issues. Rust, mostly, and Oren is hard at work chipping and sanding, treating with rust inhibitor and primer. Me? I did help for a while, but I'm fed up with it, and have decided to nurse a cold and just clear up after him; a big enough job anyway. The engine doesn't work yet, although we have hope that it will, eventually. The best thing is that I have finally got round to throwing out loads of old junk and making things a bit more comfortable. The last things to go so far have been two old duvets, one a double! which we have dragged with us for the last five years without using once. They take up so much space too!<br />
It may all sound a bit daunting after the year we have had, but really this is the best therapy there is. Getting back to real life, doing things that really need doing, saving our boat. It's good, even if it is hard work. Anyway, next week we will take a bus up to El Nido, on the northern tip of Palawan, and have a real holiday, swimming, sunbathing and having cocktails! This is assuming the weather forecast shows no typhoons coming, of course. We have another month here, it looks as though it is all going to fly by us.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-41006621994300932282013-11-18T11:51:00.002+02:002013-11-18T11:56:45.810+02:00Leaving soon, so excited....Tomorrow at this time we will be in Jordan, hopefully at the airport and waiting for our flight. It's a long journey; we leave Pardes Hanna at 7.00 am when Boaz, one of Oren's brothers, is kindly driving us to Meggido junction. Thanks Boaz! Then we get on a special bus which takes us all the way to Amman; we bought an inclusive ticket from Fly East, the cheapest way to fly to the east from Israel, and it is quite convenient too. If we had flown from Ben Gurion airport in Israel it would cost much much more, I don't understand why. So then we wait a few hours for our flight, which goes to Abu Dhabi. In Abu Dhabi we wait six hours in the airport, we aren't allowed into Abu Dhabi because we are Israelis, but I don't think I would want to go out anyway, it's the middle of the night. Then we get on the next flight, which goes to Manila. We get to Manila on the afternoon of the day after we set out, and wait three hours there for the final connecting flight from Manila to Puerto Princesa. In Puerto we have a hotel reservation for the night, and the next day, which is Thursday, we will finally get to see Chasamba. It's a marathon.<br />
We have heard from friends and from the owner of the yacht club that Chasamba is fine, still floating and quite dry. Whatever we find, as long as she is floating things will be ok. We know how to renovate and clean, and it will be a labour of love, helped along by good cold Philippine beer (at least for Oren) and plenty of mud crabs, pork baby ribs and shrimps, sweet orange mangoes and coconut curry.... You can tell I'm getting excited already!<br />
Here is the link to Chasamba.com, where I will post all our sailing related news, just click on the <a href="http://www.chasamba.com/" target="_blank">Chasamba</a>.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-47549639913706097582013-11-06T18:32:00.001+02:002013-11-06T18:32:41.085+02:00I'm not leaking!Sorry for the delay in updating! I got carried away planning our next moves and forgot I had left you all hanging on the edge of your seats waiting for the next installment of this thriller...<br />
Well, the leak test was truly awful, just as I thought it would be. We got to the hospital at about 10.00, reported to the x-ray department and were told to take a seat. After an hour it became evident that they had FORGOTTEN about me! Then, when they realized I existed, they had to start trying to get hold of Professor Shpitz, who was in the operating theatre. To make a long (long long) story short, eventually he turned up and ushered me in to the x-ray room. Of course, because this is Professor Shpitz, and everyone was falling over themselves to be useful, we ended up with two x-ray technicians, another doctor and a nurse as well as Professor Shpitz all clustered around my bare bum while I lay with my back to them on my side. The test consists of an enema with radio-opaque fluid which is introduced while x-rays are taken of the area where the join was made. This fluid is sticky and icky, and in my case the second it hit my inner bits they decided that, no, this was going OUT, and it then stuck to my legs and the hospital gown so that I got all stuck together. At least it didn't hurt much, it was just uncomfortable and very embarrassing, just as I had feared it would be. I could only hope that everyone's eyes were more on the x-ray screen than on my private version of a tsunami. As soon as I was allowed to I jumped off the table and ran (or waddled, since my gown was stuck firmly together, restricting my movements to little baby steps....) for the toilet, which mercifully was next to the x-ray room. There I stayed until I was sure everything that wanted out had come out. Then I had to rip the gown off my legs forcibly and try to get dressed without my legs sticking together meanwhile.<br />
But, somehow, I survived and as I was still frantically trying to pull on jeans over my sticky legs I was informed that the news was good, the join is fine and I can have a reversal! So it was all worth it. I just hope I never need that test again.<br />
Now, the date for the reversal was more or less in our hands, except that the waiting list meant that we had to wait at least a month or so. We went home and thought about it and decided to wait for three months and meanwhile to go back to Chasamba for a good holiday and to get her back into shape after a year and three months of sitting on her own being used as a target for bird poo, a convenient anchoring place for barnacles and a home for rust. So, we leave for the Philippines on the 19th of this month!!!! And have an operation date ready, the 3rd of February. We get back to Israel on the 14th of January, just in time to get all the pre-op blood tests done, and conveniently to do the three month check up of markers and CT too.<br />
I will keep updating here, but will also post on <a href="http://www.chasamba.com/" target="_blank">www.chasamba.com</a>, which is our sailing blog, until we come back.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-90830804911426662912013-10-28T17:56:00.000+02:002013-10-28T17:57:10.141+02:00Professor Shpitz and the way forward...So... Wednesday was Shpitzday. Naively I thought I was just going to swan in there and get a date for closure of my ileostomy. Well, no. That's not how it works. First of all I was informed that I needed a colonoscopy and a 'leak test', which, believe me, is going to be just as horrific a test as it sounds. I was anxious that these tests would take a while to set up; through my local clinic it would have taken at least a month. Fortunately, Prof. Shpitz came to the rescue, and set up both tests in the hospital, the colonoscopy today and the 'leak test' tomorrow, and I have just come home from the colonoscopy.<br />
I was really quite worried about having anything stuck up what has become rather a sensitive and delicate bit of me, and explained this (loudly) to any medical staff I could manage to trap in a corner for long enough. Luckily the colonoscopist (?) was a nice person and reassured me by deciding he would use a pediatric colonoscope and really just by making me feel that he was listening to my concerns. In the event it was a much easier colonoscopy than the first, last year, and I felt absolutely fine right afterwards. The results were good too, all clear and a recommendation to proceed with closure.<br />
Tomorrow's test is another adventure in the making, it sounds slightly awful and I hope it won't really be as bad as I fear. It involves a rubber tube, contrast medium, an x-ray machine and twenty minutes of clenched muscles. I shall say no more until tomorrow, assuming I survive.<br />
The last bit of news is that even when all these tests are done there is a waiting list for the operation. I don't think it is actually a waiting list of people wanting their ileostomies reversed, just a general waiting list for non life saving operations, and I am not sure it really bothers me. If it turns out to be a few months we will go out to Chasamba, have a lovely holiday which we both really need, and come back for the operation. It might even be better that way, since apparently it takes a while to get good bowel control back after reversal, so a good holiday beforehand might be a good idea!<br />
<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-69220796625645786302013-10-22T17:44:00.001+03:002013-10-22T17:44:15.985+03:00I was wrong!I have just come home from my appointment with Dr. Mishaeli, my oncologist. I am pleasantly surprised by what he said, and it has changed my mind about check ups.<br />
Apparently, the quite new practice of operating on liver tumours has changed the outlook for recurrent cancer survivors. If liver metastases are caught early many CAN now be removed; the five year survival figures haven't yet had time to reflect this. This means it is worth doing check ups, at least cancer markers and abdominal CT, these being the best way to discover liver metastases. I scurried home and started checking whether I can do these tests in Thailand, Taiwan and so on; yes you can! So it seems that that is what we will do. The other good piece of news is that I can do the colonoscopy before we leave, it is long enough after the operation. If that is ok I don't need another one for five years, yay! And I got Dr. Mishaeli's email, so I can always ask him if I'm not sure about anything.<br />
All in all it was well worth going to talk to him. Tomorrow Prof. Shpitz!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-36232630241677932272013-10-21T17:27:00.000+03:002013-10-21T17:27:59.994+03:00To check or not to check?So....my oncologist has thrown me out. He looked at the CT and told his secretary to tell me to come for a check up in a few months, or in his words, "Whenever you're in the country again." In other words, piss off. I'm a little harder than that to get rid of, I've made an appointment with him tomorrow ( actually it should have been Wednesday, neatly fixed just before the appointment with Prof. Shpitz, but he is going fishing on Wednesday apparently, so I got rescheduled to Tuesday, annoying but not enough to get me off his trail!). I have a few questions to ask him, but the most important one is whether I really should bother with three month check ups at all.<br />
The thing is; ok, I know my chances are about 50/50 of the cancer coming back. If it does, will early detection really change anything, or will it just mean starting a most probably futile course of chemo which will waste the rest of the time I have? Basically, which sounds better, snorkelling round the Thai islands for as long as possible, or sitting in a chemo armchair for, granted, maybe twice as long? I know which I would choose, and unless Dr. Mishaeli gives me a very good reason to change my mind, I will. I just need to be sure the statistics I have managed to find are right; it is hard to find statistics of this kind but what I have found seems to say, 'Only 30% of recurrent rectal cancer can be treated surgically. Of those cases only 30% are successfully treated. Overall, only 1% of cases are treated more successfully because of early detection of recurrence.If you have a recurrence you have about the same chance of surviving it as you do of being crowned Ms. World. Run, run fast and don't look back.'<br />
On Wednesday I will find out when I get the reversal of the ileostomy, hopefully. If there is a long wait for it we plan to fly out to Chasamba and come back, but I hope it will be soon. I did blood tests this morning, hoping to be able to show Prof. Shpitz that my counts are back to normal, but I've just looked at the results and they aren't wonderful. My liver is nearly back to normal, that's the good side, but I am still anemic and my white blood cells are still low. I can't understand it; I feel so much better, I walked to the clinic and felt good, no huffing and puffing at all. I have got the colour back in my face too. Weird. So I guess grabbing any spare reversal-operation slot available this week is out?<br />
<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-2773739857387315562013-10-11T22:28:00.001+03:002013-10-11T22:28:38.003+03:00CT Scan done, on we plod...On Sunday I had my CT scan. This time I did it in Netanya, at the Laniado Hospital, which is much nicer than the overcrowded clinic in Bnei Brac where I did the first two. I sat there for the compulsory two hours of drinking yukky contrast medium, even though none of this stuff had any way to get into my nether regions where the scan was most important. Then came the time to lie on the table and get injected with radioactive iodine, which was even more fun. At least it made my whole body hot- it was a little cool in the waiting room, ha ha. Then wait for the disc and ask how long we have to wait for interpretation, and I got a shock; three weeks! We asked to be given priority, although we didn't really have much of an excuse, and the receptionist said she would try, no promises. So, imagine my surprise when the next morning I got an email from the clinic saying my results were ready! They really came through for us, well done Mor Clinic!<br />
Now, the results look good; no visible metastasis anywhere, no enlarged lymph nodes, the only thing is a thickening of the tissue around the operation site which is almost certainly scar tissue. I've faxed the results to my oncologist and now we are waiting to hear if these results are good enough to get a green light to go on to the ileostomy closure. We are hoping they will be, we are so longing to get out of here back to Chasamba, our floating home, waiting faithfully for us in Puerto Princesa in the Philippines. These are the last few hurdles we have to jump.<br />
Generally I am feeling gradually better, although the improvement isn't as fast as I had hoped, probably because my liver has taken quite a shot and may take a while to recover. I have started walking, although today was too hot- we're into the ups and downs of temperature that typify autumn here, and today was almost as hot as the middle of summer. Yoga is good, I can do all the lesson now, even when it is a hard one, and I have started slowly to clean and reorganise our little house; it had got into quite a mess since I didn't even try to clean towards the end of chemo. Luckily neither of us really care. I am juicing most days, and really like the combination of beetroot, apple, carrot and celery- it is really tasty! Also still taking wheatgrass, and eating dark chocolate, drinking astragalus tea... I'm trying everything, more or less, and eating plenty of salad and fruit. Really just so if the cancer does come back I can say, "Well, I tried everything!" The problem with that being that there will always be some quack remedy that I didn't try, but at least I'm having a fair crack at it.<br />
The best thing about finishing chemo is that I can eat ICECREAM! I have had a whole summer with no air-conditioning allowed and no icecream, I think that is the cruelest part of all. Now I can eat it, and I'm enjoying it, just finished a big bowl of chocolate chip and vanilla, yum!<br />
<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-41950281215034041802013-09-27T10:31:00.002+03:002013-09-27T10:31:47.199+03:00All Done!I finished the last tablet of Xeloda on Wednesday. It is a funny feeling; a mixture of relief that this long six months of chemo is finally over and worry that now I'm flying solo, nothing poisoning any left over cancer cells. There is the knowledge in the back of my mind that my chance of surviving five years is only around 50%, and the worry that the next CT, the next blood tests, the next colonoscopy will tell me that my time is up. Maybe this seems so much more pertinent now because I am into the next stage of this saga, the waiting game. It may be that for me at least, this is the hardest part of all; until now I was being treated, doing something about it- now there is nothing I can do to influence the future. Well, I've given it my best shot, had the full treatment, taken every pill on time ( well, maybe forgot once or twice, but not much). I can at least say that I've done the most I can.<br />
The weather has changed here, it's much cooler and although that is nice I have gotten my traditional first autumn cold. Just a sniffle, and I'm sure it's nothing to do with the chemo, I really do get this sniffle every year, at least when we are in Israel, but it makes me feel down. It's hard to sleep with a blocked nose!<br />
Taking stock, what long term effects has chemo left me with? It seems not many; I still have a slight loss of feeling in my fingertips but I think it is getting better and may well disappear completely. I still have pins and needles and my hands lose feeling when I take something out of the fridge. My blood counts are still down, but should bounce back soon. My appetite is still variable, but that can only be a good thing, the occasional day of not eating much isn't going to hurt me; my weight is stable at a comfortable 57.5 to 58 kilos depending on how dehydrated/ well hydrated I am. My skin has held up well, I haven't had any of the peeling and soreness which often happens with Xeloda, but it is very dry and I must pamper it a bit with lotion. Fatigue is still a nuisance, but after all it's early days yet. I want so much to start walking and get strong again but I just have to wait, another week, another two weeks...Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-8895940155661469112013-08-27T09:46:00.002+03:002013-08-27T09:46:39.394+03:00Just one more to go and I'm out of here!I had the seventh out of eight treatments of Oxaliplatin last week, and this time wasn't too bad at all, although I had the misfortune to be assigned the nurse from hell; short tempered, careless and unfriendly....until she found out from her colleagues that I worked as a nurse for 14 years there. Then she tried to back pedal furiously. Burn in hell, Svetlana! Nurses working in Oncology HAVE to have at least a little compassion and bedside manner ( or armchair manner, I guess); this nurse I wouldn't have let treat a dog, and if I get a chance to talk to the Sister, whom I know well, I will definitely bring that subject up. To be fair, until now I have been spoiled rotten by Maia, an American nurse who is really great; she was on holiday this time.<br />
The Oncology dept. has been moved temporarily while they renovate, and it is stuck in an old Internal Medicine ward; the air-conditioners there have only two speeds, freezing and off, so I spent the whole treatment under two blankets with a hot water bottle! (Cold is the enemy of Oxaliplatin.) I hope they are back home by my next and last treatment on September 11th.<br />
I really don't feel too bad, and I'm attributing at least part of that to the wheatgrass juice I have been drinking. I am the last person to believe in quack remedies, but after looking at the amount of vitamins and nutrients in a shot of wheatgrass I decided it couldn't do any harm to try it, and I do feel a measurable improvement in how I feel. Blood tests are inconclusive, because I don't know what they would be like if I wasn't taking it; I had a big drop in all counts before I started taking it, and so far I have had one blood count taken which shows a small drop in most parameters but not anything like the previous test, and thrombocytes up. So who knows? Maybe it's doing some good. I do feel pretty weak, probably because my hemoglobin is low, so I just chill out as much as possible, which is a lot. My chess is getting much better- anemia seems to improve it, maybe because I feel much more capable of calmly thinking about the next move without hotbloodedness making me jump too soon. And I'm reading the Maddaddam trilogy, two of which I read ages ago, and the third has just come out so I'm starting from the beginning to refresh my memory, finished the first already. And following all the boats trying for the Northwest Passage this year, interesting because it is a bad ice year and I'm betting several get stuck over winter in the Arctic. One boat is a fibreglass catamaran with two small children on board!<br />
I have lined up a CT scan for 6th October, the earliest I could do it without annoying my Oncologist, who wanted to wait a month after the last treatment. Then I have to wait for the results, which generally take two weeks, and back to Professor Shpitz to get the ileostomy closed.<br />
So, 15 days today to the end of treatment! Or actually a month, because I keep taking the Xeloda for another two weeks after that, but it bothers me less. I can't wait to start building my strength up again, the Annapurna circuit beckons!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-381361079150937272013-08-03T20:23:00.001+03:002013-08-03T20:23:16.488+03:00I'm still standing...Sorry to all my faithful readers for being so lazy, I know it's been a long time since I updated. So, I'm now past the sixth chemo dose, and it is definitely getting harder. My blood counts are down quite substantially, and I only just scraped past the check-up before the infusion; my platelets are 98 whatevers when the lowest they should be for chemo is 100 whatevers. Still, I can tentatively say that I feel less bad this cycle than last, the last one really did me in for a few days and while I did feel really bad on the day, this time I seem not to be crashing into a really yucky state like last time.Maybe I was dehydrated, or maybe the chemo was a really strong batch, no way of knowing but I truly felt awful for a while.<br />
I have learned that it isn't a good idea to try and force my body to do anything it doesn't really want to do; I'm just worried it will get spoiled and want an easy life after chemo too. On the other hand I am quite determined to do the Annapurna Circuit next October, so I guess I will have to lick it into shape by then, whatever it thinks about it!<br />
The timetable for the next few months looks like this; September 11th last chemo dose, early October CT which my oncologist is quite optimistic about, in fact he said that he is confident that there will be no pathology visible, to which I answered, so why do I need a scan? Of course I had to ask, and the answer is that this is the baseline scan, so that if there is recurrence later they know it is new. Then back to Professor Shpitz to set a date for the ileostomy reversal, hopefully some time in November, and some time in December ESCAPE, back to paradise!!!!<br />
Chasamba is waiting for us, the season will be perfect to sail to the Gulf of Thailand, it is all I am thinking about and it keeps me going. Just two more doses of poison, one scan and one little operation and we're out of here!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-64510596799290382792013-07-11T14:55:00.000+03:002013-07-11T14:55:05.681+03:00Here we go again....Number five. Not too bad, just pins and needles, yukky feeling when I drink anything cool, no appetite ( actually a plus as I did gain a bit during the famous 'good weeks') general tiredness. I've learned how to mess about, do nothing and not feel guilty, since if I do try to do too much on these days I just get nasty and weepy, and no-one, least of all me, needs that. So doing nothing is a good thing. I can sweetly greet Oren when he comes home from working twelve hours and say " Oh, I'm so glad you're home, I'm dying for a cup of tea." This is a big improvement from, " Where have you been, I'm exhausted, I did the laundry, made dinner, went shopping, why do I have to do everything, wa wa wa..." ! And Oren being so sweet, he really doesn't mind making me a cup of tea, cooking something nice for dinner, clearing up at least a bit of the mess I've made during the day. I really am very lucky, and I do appreciate that.<br />
I did go to yoga, and even stopped on the way back to get stuff for Oren's muesli, which he mixes himself.He uses an incredible amount of oatmeal, we are getting to the point that we could get deliveries straight from the oatmeal lorry! I should eat it too, it is good for my stoma output, but I'm not really keen on it. In fact I find I am drawn exactly to the foods which are the least recommended, salads, oily food, sushi, burekas, anything which I know I will spend the next few hours emptying tons of liquid output after. I don't really care though, I am not going to survive on potato, rice and oatmeal for the next few months. I just drink more, probably four to five litres a day, and keep my salt intake high. Potato crisps are one recommended food that I do eat!<br />
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<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-72241757615860054702013-06-26T08:47:00.001+03:002013-06-26T08:47:39.331+03:00Halfway, and I've found my best friend again!Four rounds of Oxaliplatin down, four to go. I feel fine now, the two good weeks are ahead of me and I'm on the home run. No worsening of side effects, even I can say that this round was easier for some reason, maybe because I finally started using the Lorivan which was prescribed for me to use on the days after the IV. The protocol has changed, I don't get calcium and magnesium any more because new studies have shown that it doesn't make any difference to the side effects. My personal experiences agree with this, it didn't make any difference and saved me half an hour or more at the hospital.<br />
The best thing that has happened to me for a long time happened this week. I found my best friend again. I don't know how we lost contact but I am so glad she is back; I went up to meet her in the nice, quiet community where she now lives and we spent the whole day just talking. I was hoarse when I came home! So much has happened in both our lives since we lost contact eight years ago, we have both changed but somehow we seem to have changed in the same way. We still just understand each other, and it is wonderful. I feel happy in a way I haven't for a long time. Just to balance things out the microwave packed up this morning- good trade off, universe, I'm willing to renew all my electrical appliances this way!Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-10040010092468453372013-06-08T17:05:00.000+03:002013-06-08T17:06:03.300+03:00Out with the goats, in with a Green Monkey!There is a traditional Israeli story about a man who goes to his rabbi and says " Rabbi, please, you have to help me, my wife and I and our five children and my parents and her parents, we all live in a tiny one room house, I think I'm going crazy. What can I do to improve this situation?" The rabbi smiles and says, " That's easy. Buy a goat and take it home, let it live in your house with you for a month and come back to see me." The man really thinks this rabbi has gone mad, but being a religious man he has no choice but to do what the rabbi said, so he gets a goat on the way home. We'll gloss over the terrible argument he has with his wife, the delighted reactions of the kids and the surprised expression of the goat, and fast forward a month. He drags himself into the rabbi's office ( or whatever rabbi's have, maybe it isn't an office) and falls on the floor crying. " I can't stand another minute of this," he screams. The rabbi smiles and says, " Now take the goat to market and sell it." The man whoops for joy and rushes off to get the goat. When he gets home from the market he goes into his house and is amazed at how much space there now is...<br />
Suffice to say that Pziza, Iza and her kids are now frolicking happily in the meadow belonging to the boarding school that Oren's brother works at, and I feel that there is so much space in my life...<br />
And I have met a Green Monkey! Green Monkey, aka Shannon E. Kennedy, is a wonderfully creative and sometimes painfully honest blogger who has been through having breast cancer and now has rectal cancer. 'Follow me, I have no idea where I'm going', is her motto, I love it! Here is a link to her blog, and it's on the blog roll too. <a href="http://greenmonkeytales.blogspot.co.il/" target="_blank">Green Monkey Tales</a><br />
I started this blog for two reasons. One was to keep friends and family updated, so I didn't have to worry about forgetting someone or whatever. The other reason was that when I was first diagnosed I looked for advice, support or just people with similar experiences to know what it was really going to be like, and it turns out that there are very few of us 'wrecked tail cancer' ( love that!) bloggers out there. Now I am part of the way through the treatment, I have had the pre-adjuvant therapy, the operation and some of the adjuvant chemo and I do have things that I have learned, I can say to people just starting this, " Keep your head up, it's not as bad as it sounds, you can do this!"<br />
I don't know how many people like me read this blog, I know there must be a certain percentage of readers who are going through this too but Green Monkey is the first to make contact with me, and it makes me feel that it is so worthwhile blogging. Honestly, sometimes I was wondering whether I was talking to myself! ( Which isn't too bad anyway, sometimes just writing is good therapy anyway). So, I'm really happy this week. Also because I'm into the time when I feel good again after the IV, and I have another eleven precious days of good feeling time. And I have adopted a dog, she is lovely and we went to the beach with her today and had fun, but I'll write about that next time.<br />
<br />Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3123810276320482592.post-72999655677305829992013-06-04T12:07:00.001+03:002013-06-04T12:35:33.707+03:00A Tospy Turvy Week.I have felt so up and down, inside out all week. I don't know if it is the steroids or just the effects of chemo getting more pronounced, but I felt weird, moody and not myself. Today I am feeling a bit better, I hope this trend will continue. Oren is working very hard all week, which doesn't help; at least he got a pay rise though!<br />
We have a problem with the goats; it is too hard for me to do all the work with them during the week when I feel bad- I just want to curl up in a ball, not to get up at 6 am to milk Iza and feed them, take them to pasture for hours and drag them around after me. Unfortunately the other people who were supposed to help are too busy too. The end result is that the goats are suffering, although being goats they don't really seem to care. We haven't milked Iza for the last few days, just let the kids have all the milk, lucky them. It is a bit hot to go out to pasture anyway, so as long as they get plenty of food and have an hour or two free in the meadow to stretch their legs every day I think they will be fine. Meanwhile Pziza has been taken to the boarding school where Boaz works to meet a nice billy goat and hopefully start a family, it is quite a bit easier without her since she was the source of most goat naughtiness around here. Maybe she will come back with an education too!<br />
Other news; we are in the process of adopting a dog! Sofi is part canaani , the Bedouin dog, and three years old. She is a good dog, not too big but big enough to guard, and she seems to be fitting in well. She has been here for a day so far, and seems fine. She doesn't worry the goats at all, Iza makes a kind of half hearted 'danger' call when she comes up to her but there is no real tension or hysterical running off, which goats do for no reason anyway, it's a goat thing. The kids don't even run to Iza when they see her, they seem to realize that she isn't going to attack them. Still, I am a bit careful, I don't completely trust her yet. She doesn't seem to have a wonderful memory for people, she knows me but barked at Oren when he came home even though he had given her a bowl of chicken the day before! She had better get that straight! She isn't in good condition, but I expect a month or two in the Mosenzon household will do its magic.<br />
We aren't really thinking ahead too far, we know there is a good chance that we will go back to Chasamba at the end of the year but we will cross that bridge when we get to it. If Sofi makes herself welcome Oren's parents might keep her. Anyway, for the next few months she will have a good home.Lesleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13950919522712462953noreply@blogger.com4